Celebrating Women...for the Real World
Saturday, April 29, 2006 A Great Big Thank You and the cat on crack


It was so funny yesterday afternoon when the mail was delivered. It almost seems like she knew. Mercedes came running to greet me at the door and I had a package addressed to her. Carrie's kittys, Lerory, Sarabi and Mufassa came to her rescue with a supply of Cat Crack. They heard that she had run out and had hidden the package.







This is her reaction when she saw the package and then when I opened one...well, lets just say the humans were excused and she was in her own little world.







And here is my first attempt to upload a video. This is a special thank you to Carrie, Lerory, Sarabi, and Mufassa from Mercedes:


Video Hosting - Upload Video - Photo Sharing
.
.
.
.
PS: Carrie is my favorite human right now!...love, Mercedes

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 2:20 AM :: 12 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Friday, April 28, 2006 Stuff Portrait Friday!


Kristine wants us to remember what we learned a few weeks ago (you know…perspective and creativity) and use it for this weeks assignment. This week, you get two for one. So here we go, post pictures of:

1. Something Big
2. Something Small
3. Half of Something


SuZan


SOMETHING BIG

This would be Mercedes’ nose. For such a tiny cat (6 lbs.), her nose could be classified as a honker. Especially when this is what you see when you first open your eyes in the morning (not to mention the tuna breath).


SOMETHING SMALL

Creativity seems to be in short supply with me today, but I give you a lady bug to represent something small.


HALF OF SOMETHING


I tried and tried to be creative on this one and nothing was coming to mind. Then the light bulb went off; I had an a-ha moment and thought that a half moon might be worthy of SPF (wish I had taken the picture though).

Sheri


Something Big-This was our "Girls Night" dinner. Big calories here baby!


Something Small-From a perspective standpoint I tried to make this something big. But then it came out looking kind of small. So I'm killing two birds with one stone. These are the flowers my boss sent me for Admin. Asst's Day. First time he's done anything, FOR ANYONE. This is a small gesture on his part, but it made a big impact on me!

Half of Something-That would be me, this morning, HALF DRESSED! No school today, so no kids to get up and out. More time for me!


Did you play?











Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 12:37 AM :: 29 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Wednesday, April 26, 2006 Fug Thursday-YIKES!

Okie Dokie! A little drunken post as I've had a lot on my plate and need a little off time for the old brain. So please forgive any typos or grammatical errors (that's what makes drunken posts so much fun!)

Here we go. My first FUG Thursday post. I can't believe someone would actually walk outside of the house wearing something like this!


















Yes, long socks with shorts! I mean holy shit-who would actually wear something like that! OK, I confess, that was me. My daughter took that picture. The story behind the socks-I was going out to work in the yard, you know, weed eat and all, and I didn't want to get my legs all cut up and shit. We had fun with this. After my daughter took my picture and fell on the floor laughing at me, I ran after her and threatened to touch her with the "long socks". Geez, you would have thought I had some kind of disease the way she was running and screaming! I caught her!

You know you're old when you can laugh at yourself!

On another note. Blogger, why are you making the word verification so darn long, and in that funny font that a sober person can hardly read? Can you give a sista a break?

And to leave you with a funny, here is a picture of the cake I made for girls night. Following is a picture of what the cake looked like after I was done with my shower (my husband and son looked like the cat that ate the canary!). In my younger years, I would have thrown a fit and bought something else to take. This time, I took it just like it was!
































Happy FUG Thursday!

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 9:08 PM :: 6 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

The New High School Football Stadium...and the juvinile delequent that snuck in

Our new High School Stadium is not open yet, so what does a young 17 year old decide to do? Well... go in anyway.


G2 and a friend decided that they wanted to check out the new stadium they will be playing in next year. This is outside the stadium.

He is such a Ham! He took his football so they could try out the field.


It is probably a good thing he doesn't want to be an attorney anymore, he certainly needs to learn the golden rule of "leave no evidence" behind.

Oh and yes they were caught by the police. Fortunately for them, he just made the boys leave.

BOYS!...geezzzzz


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 4:11 PM :: 6 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Tuesday, April 25, 2006 Local Gas Prices

I checked this out in my area this morning! As far as I can tell, the information is correct, for now at least!

This is pretty nifty. Just enter your zip code in the site below, and it tells you which gas stations have the cheapest prices (and the highest) on gas in your zip code area. It's updated every evening.

Click HERE for your local gas prices.

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 6:30 AM :: 3 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Monday, April 24, 2006 Girly Night!

Sheri and I usually have a casual girly night with food, margaritas and good company when my guys go camping. This weekend the campout was cancelled (because of adults getting sick) but we had girly night anyway (Big G was a great sport). Can you guess who joined us?


Yep, you guessed it Carrie joined us. Of course Mercedes LOVED her because she came bearing gifts (I’ll come back to this part). As usual, Sheri’s margaritas were STRONG, but not as bad as the last time. The food and the company were great as always, I had to introduce Carrie to Lewi and can you believe she actually touched him (yuck!), and even Sheri got brave and touched him, as for myself...NOT A CHANCE! (note to self...keep camara in hand so as not to have to touch the lizard).

Carrie came bearing gifts; she hit the nail on the head and appealed to our pyro side with some wonderful Yankee tea lights. But the most popular gift was the treats she brought to Mercedes. The package said "Temptations", but Carrie kept on calling it “kitty crack” (and she was right).

Mercedes loved the “kitty crack” so much that after everyone went home, she knocked them off of the table and dragged them beneath the coffee table. She then fell asleep on them until I went to bed…THANKS CARRIE!

My cat is now addicted!

:)


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 6:30 PM :: 5 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Friday, April 21, 2006 It's Stuff Portrait Friday!!!!

The wonderful & witty Kristine at Random and odd said "It's time for Stuff Portrait Friday!"

"Stuff Portrait Friday-what's that?"

It's easy, it's fun, and everyone who wants to can play. This game is for everyone. Encourage your players to play and comment on your blog if they played so you can get to know your readers. If you want to send them over here to let me know they played, Great!


Stuff Portrait Friday: April 21st, 2006 - Your Initials

1. Sheri - S - I'm going to take a picture of something that starts with a S — You take your first initial and take a picture of something…

2. Middle initial - Yep, now take a picture of something that starts with your middle initial

3. Last name initial - Yes…it’s this easy!


Here we go!

S is for......supper (mmmm, chicken pot pie) and I cheated cause S also stands for "self portrait"


A is for.......apple of course (my hubs wouldn't let me post a pic of my arse!)

(I think this pic turned out pretty cool)

K is for.......hmm, I thought Knuckle, then I thought kick in the pants, but best of all, KIDS! Here are two of my three after eating Easter cupcakes!


So there you have it.......Give me a "S", give me an "A", give me a "K"......What do you have?

SAK!

Did you play?


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 6:03 AM :: 24 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Thursday, April 20, 2006 The World of Blogging

I can't believe that SuZan and I have been blogging for almost a year. When we ventured out into the blogosphere, we had certain ideas and goals regarding what we wanted to accomplish. We have been successful to a certain extent as far as achieving this. One thing that we weren't expecting was that we would meet such wonderful people. We don't think of you all as "people who visit our blog", we think of you as friends.

What do I base this on? Well, when Cat and her family were displaced due to Katrina, I felt for her and her family. Now her husband is facing a tough recovery due to a motorcycle accident. Sometimes I read her posts and cry. I feel her pain.

Then there's Merritt. SuZan, Merritt and I seem to be on the same plane in so many ways. Our kids are about the same age, so we can relate to the "teenager stories". Often times I'll be doing something and think "What would Merritt do?". I think if she lived close, we'd probably be getting together often.

Somehow we found TKW. Our "momma duck" is very witty. I fell in love with her down to earth outlook on being a wife, a mother, a daughter, and a contributing member to society. It was a privilege to meet her at the "Blogger Blow Out" in Austin. I feel like I know her and her family and often wish that I could call her up and offer to baby sit so she could just get away. No one appreciates how difficult being a "stay at home mom" is until they've done it. Sometimes a girl just needs to get away.

Through Mamma Duck, we found Kami. Kami is full of energy and life. At the same time she is very compassionate and knows that it's important to stop and smell the roses. I love to visit her blog and enjoy getting to know her. The other day she posted about wishing she could take away the pain from everyone that's hurting. Kami, you do. Every time I read one of your witty posts, I smile. Smiling and laughter is good for the soul.

At the Blogger Blow Out, we met so many new people. Our blog roll has grown. It is very cool to be able to put names with faces. Of course, just like I'm not known at Sheri to my kids' friends (I'm M's mom, or J's mom, or G's mom, or SuZan's friend - which is very cool); when I refer to our blogging buddies I'll say "Football Widow, or Random Ramblings, or Rant & Ravin, or The Lumins." There are so many more bloggers that we love, love, love! Take a look at our blog roll. Between SuZan and I, we try to visit each of you daily. Every single one of those blogs over there are awesome!

What's the point of this post? The point is to thank you to our faithful readers. Not just readers, but friends. Know that we think of you all as our friends. We laugh with you, we cry with you, we hurt for you, we get mad at the people that hurt you, but first and foremost, we're here for you! Thanks for visiting us. You all are a big part of our day!

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 8:05 AM :: 16 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Tuesday, April 18, 2006 Breakfast Pizza Recipe

About the recipe, OK, I'll post it, but be warned, my brain is spinning and I am in a rambling kind of mood. If at any point you get totally confused, I apologize.

Breakfast Pizza-Sheri Style (quick & easy ladies)

My kids like the crust. So I use a cookie sheet (I bet this is also known as a jelly roll pan. My mother who owned a restaurant and catering business is turning in her grave). I bet one of those cooking stones would work well.

Remember, this is what I did for my kids that don't like anything except fast food.

1) heat oven to 375

2) Line cookie sheet with non-stick foil

3) Spread refrigerated croissant dough making as thin or thick as you like. I "crimped" the edges to form a lip. I should have taken a picture. In other words, since my kids like the crust, I didn't spread the crust to the edge so it was kind of thicker.

4) Cut up as much ham as your family desires. I used about a cup. Nothing fancy. Sandwich meat works great. Spread over dough. (sausage or bacon works well)

5) Beat 5 eggs. Add 1/4 cup milk (I used less-my kids don't like runny eggs and, the more milk, the longer it takes to cook. I also added about 1/2 tsp salt & 1/4 tsp pepper (improvise baby)

6) Pour egg mixture over the dough/ham stuff. I didn't go all the way to the edge as I have caught a pizza like this on fire when the egg stuff started running. Don't ask.

7) Sprinkle about 1 cup of shredded cheese over egg mixture. I used cheddar as that's what my kids prefer.

8) Bake at 375 for about 25 mins.

OK-here's some variations. This is how you can tell that I probably can cook, but I pretend that I can't. When you grow up with a chef, you use a recipe as a guide then get creative and adjust accordingly. My mom taught us to cook with our senses. We know when something is mixed to the proper consistency by feel and how it looks. We can usually tell something is done by how it looks and smells. We smell and taste to determine if something needs to be tweaked. And we listen for....Oh yeah, the smoke detectors (no, really...I catch things on fire....often!)

For more of a casserole type dish:

Spread dough in 9 x 13 pan (make sure to go slightly up the sides)
Spread 1 cup frozen hash browns over dough (Probably thaw first)
Sprinkle cooked sausage (about 1 pd) over hash browns
Add the 5 beaten eggs with the milk and seasonings as stated above
Then the cheese

This may take a little longer to bake. It will be more like a casserole. I'd check at 25 mins.

And another take:

If I were to make this for adults, this is what I would do.

Spread dough in 9 x 13 pan
Spread dough with a light coating of Dijon mustard (Must be Dijon, not regular)
Saute some onions and mushrooms (the amount depends on your liking. Since this is for breakfast, less is best as far as the onions)
spread over dough
Then the ham (ham works best with the onions and mushrooms. Bacon would also work well)
Then the egg/milk/seasonings (If your adventuous a little paprika or ugh, I can't think of the other spice but I think it's nutmeg makes for an interesting flavor. Just a dab will do ya. The nutmeg really works well if you add spinach-which I wouldn't because spinach in the morning makes me want to barf. Me, I'd stick with the salt & pepper)
Add cheese (for this, I would use probably 1/2 cup SHARP WHITE cheddar (very different flavor from the yellow cheddar) and 1/2 cup Swiss) Again, this is where you must see it to decide how much of each type of cheese would work best. Oh yeah, if you use sausage instead of ham, don't use the Swiss, sharp cheddar or Dijon mustard-yuck! With sausage, the mild shredded cheddar works best.

Bake at 375 for about 25 mins. My guess would be 30 mins.

Good luck!

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 10:05 PM :: 5 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Tickle Tuesday

This is really more of a puzzle, but it is really cool! Don't cheat! It only takes a few minutes.

On a side note, Merritt would be so proud of me. Today is TAKS testing day (standardized testing in the schools-whole post in and of itself). I wanted to send the kids off with a good breakfast so a made a breakfast pizza. Considering how crazy our mornings are, this proved to be a brave task on my part. I just did a few steps at a time (like Merritt does when she makes cookies). After my shower at 5:00 AM (that's AM people) I ran out to the kitchen and turned on the oven. After my make-up, I ran out and spread the croissant dough onto a cookie sheet making sure to "crimp" the sides. After I partially dried my hair, I ran out and cut up some ham and spread it over the croissant. After I got dressed, I beat 5 eggs and a little milk. I ran up stairs to make sure the boys were awake. Came down, added salt & pepper to the eggs, then poured this mixture over the ham. Then I sprinkled about a cup of shredded cheddar cheese on top, stuck it in the oven at 375 for 25 mins. I poured their drinks, passed out lunch money & vitamins, opened the mini donuts (you know, sugar for energy :0 ) , then finished drying my hair. By the time all the kids were downstairs, the pizza was finished. It was AWESOME!

Now that you're hungry, here's the puzzle - Remember, don't scroll down until you've done each step!


1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate (more than once but less than 10)




2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)



3. Add 5


4. Multiply it by 50 -- I'll wait while you get the calculator!

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1756 . If you haven't, add 1755.


6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.


You should have a three digit number

The first digit of this was your original number(i.e., how many times you want to have chocolate each week.)

The next two numbers are YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it is!!!!!)

THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2006) IT WILL EVER WORK, SO SPREAD IT AROUND WHILE IT LASTS.

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 8:11 AM :: 11 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Monday, April 17, 2006 Shopping with Teenagers

Hair Cut & Blow Dry-$51.00

Two hours trying on Clothes and discussing the price-$200+ (OK, 3 kids plus an outfit for myself-not bad)

Laughing so hard with my daughter during lunch that Diet Coke came out of her nose plus the hug I got that night when she told me thank you and how much fun she had today----PRICELESS!

The teenage years definitely have benefits! The good days like this totally wipe out any of the negative stuff!

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 8:41 AM :: 6 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Sunday, April 16, 2006 Happy Easter Everyone!


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 12:35 AM :: 5 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Friday, April 14, 2006 Stuff Portrait Friday!


Kristine is definitely gearing up for some random and odd pictures across the blogosphere this week. Her request is to take pictures of:






1. Your Peeps - introduce us to some of your friends outside of the blog world.
2. Something Fuzzy - *shaking head* you guys keep it clean.
3. Something/Someone you want to dye/die - Yeah, shut up, you’ve thought of it!


MY PEEPS


These are some of my peeps that I love working with. I’m at this school on Thursdays and I always try to spend a couple of hours in this classroom working with the kids. Back row we have Donna, Charlotte, and Cinnamon; seated we have Kim and Robin. These gals make learning fun for the kids and happen to be a lot of fun too.



SOMETHING FUZZY


This is such a cheap shot since I used Mercedes last week too. Oh well, she is fuzzy and quite entertaining.



SOMETHING I WANT TO DIE


This is Texas folks and fire ants are such a pain in the assets down here. I am quite a peaceful person but if all the fire ants were to DIE, I wouldn’t shed a tear.


Did you play?

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 12:17 AM :: 23 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Thursday, April 13, 2006 What Day Is It?

Oh yeah, it's Thursday. Since we have off tomorrow for the holiday, my brain is convinced it's Friday. OK, so maybe I'm quite possibly suffering from a little chocolate overload! That darn Easter Bunny left a basket of cadberry eggs and reases on my desk while I was in a meeting. Bad, bunny, bad!

We don't want any of our regular blogging bitches to come here and not be entertained. Here is some mindless.....I'm not sure what you'd call it, but it's cool!

Until we meet again......

If you can read this, you have a strange mind too! Can you raed tihs? So far 141 people can.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at
Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a
wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be
in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed
it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and
I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad
it.

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 11:56 AM :: 4 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Smarter Than The Average Bear…well sometimes!

It is no secret that G2 is totally obsessed with sports and loves to take advantage of living in a large city and attend professional games (mainly Astros games because tickets are reasonable). In the past, it has been difficult for him to talk Big G into going to games as he is not a fanatic like our son; but G2 has successfully thought out and executed a plan to up their attendance (and it is working).

He goes online and purchases two ten dollar tickets. If the game isn’t sold out, they can move to better seats. He goes up to Big G and tells him that he wants to take him to the game and that he has bought the tickets. You know the rest, dad drives (we are not ready to turn him loose down town driving or through all the construction), dad pays for parking, dad pays for food (and you know the boy can eat), dad pays for memorabilia, etc. This is what he has done for the last five or six games they have attended (even the 18 inning Division Championship Astros game last year).

No way can dad resist his son, after all G2 did buy the tickets. Pretty clever eh?

Sometimes the boy is smarter than the average bear!

Sometimes.

:)

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 5:51 AM :: 8 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Tuesday, April 11, 2006 Tickle Tuesday....

THERE IS SOMETHING HERE FOR EVERYBODY!!!


If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

(Now that's more like it!)

The human heart! creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

(O.M.G.!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.

(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death! .

(Creepy.)

(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour

(Don't try this at home, maybe at work)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.

("Honey, I'm home. What the....?!")

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.

(30 minutes..lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.

(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

(Hmmmmmm......)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.

(okay, so that would be a good thing)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.

(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains.

(I know some people like that too.)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(What about that pig??)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread these crazy facts and pass this on to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle). In other words, pass it on to everyone!

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 4:14 AM :: 16 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Monday, April 10, 2006 Monday Morning Stress Test

I know that we are all feeling stress from everyday life. However, we need to measure and manage our stress levels.

Especially on Monday mornings.

I'm not sure exactly how it works, but this is amazingly accurate.

Read the full description before looking at the picture.

The picture below has two identical dolphins in it. It was used in a case study on stress levels at St. Mary's Hospital.

Look at both dolphins jumping out of the water.

The dolphins are identical.

A closely monitored, scientific study revealed that in spite of the fact that the dolphins are identical, a person under stress would find differences in the two dolphins. If there are many differences, found between both dolphins, it means that the person is experiencing a great amount of stress.

Look at the photograph, if you find more than one or two differences, you may want to take a vacation.


Scroll down...















Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 9:15 AM :: 8 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Thursday, April 06, 2006 Stuff Portrait Friday!











TGIF a la Random & Odd!
Kristine has given us a list of random and odd pictures to post. This week's assignment is to take pictures of:

1. Macro: take a picture of something ‘close up’. Don’t use your zoom, make sure you have good lighting and make sure you’re steady. If you have to, set your camera down on something and then take the picture.

2. NO FLASH: try switching the flash off and taking pictures of your stuff without it. It may take a lot of pictures to get the right shot, but open the windows and find artificial light to get it to work.

3. Perspective: get up high or down low…either way, change the perspective of your picture...tilt the camera sideways. Change the layout of the picture. Instead of having the subject framed perfectly in the middle of the picture…move it to the left or the right.



MACRO

Although this is really not a macro close up, it is about as close as I’m getting to G2’s lizard. Meet Lewi, the lizard. He has been in our home for seven years. God only knows how this thing is still alive because I won’t care for it. He used to be in the living room in a 20 gallon tank, but now that he requires an 80 gallon tank his home is the boy’s room. Now if you can imagine, filthy room, teenager, science experiments, and Lewi poop. Hmmmm mmmmm can’t you just imagine how it smells in there.

NO FLASH


I have posted this one before but, this is Mercedes high on catnip. I tried to take the picture with a flash and she got that “deer in the headlights” look.


PERSPECTIVE

Since I know I could never compete with Kristine or Kami I’m going to use “perspective” loosely. Here you see Mercedes attacking and eating my mouse, my computer’s mouse; not the furry, breathing, crawly kind. If she saw one of those, she would probably go hide under the bed. So here is a perspective of our Supreme Mouser!


Did you play?


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 10:17 PM :: 21 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Be Careful When Offering To Help With Homework

My youngest is in 7th grade. He was out of school for an entire week. It all started with the flu and then he came down with strep throat. In other words, he felt like crap all week. I went up to school on Friday to pick up his work so he wouldn't be so far behind. There was a science packet with worksheets that required you to fill in the blank with the appropriate vocab word. Of course no book came with it, so I figured a little help from me would be necessary.

Here is an excerpt from our adventure:

"Hey G, why don't we work on Science. You're great with vocab and I'll help you figure out some of the words you don't know."

....here's when I should have known what trouble was to come.......

G: "OK, then I'll be ready for my test on the reproductive system."


Me: "blink, blink" (secretly thinking back to my days in school and the reproductive unit-you know, the film with the flower)

Me: "OK. The first sentence says The (blank) is also known as the birth canal."

He knew the appropriate word - vagina.

.....still thinking this wasn't so bad......

Me: "A (blank) is what occurs when a male's penis is engorged with blood." (OK, I'm literally holding my breath waiting for some kind of response or silliness.
G: "Erection"
Me: (Exhaling slowly) "Correct. Do you want to keep working on this, or would you rather use the internet to look up words your not sure of?"
G: "No, this is fine."
We finished the worksheets, using words like ejaculation, ovaries, and the likes. We ended up having a very intelligent conversation about the human body and sex. I was very proud of him and how mature he was acting. I don't think I could have ever finished a worksheet like this with my mom when I was twelve. Heck, she couldn't even talk to me about the importance of getting "your female parts checked". She never would use the appropriate terms and we never had an open and frank discussion as I did with my son. By the end of the afternoon, I was very proud of my son, his outlook on girls, relationships, and yes-sex.

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 7:13 AM :: 8 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Tuesday, April 04, 2006 Tickle Tuesday!

Here is some important financial advice:

If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00.

With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00.

With WorldCom, of $1000.00 you would have had less than $5.00 left.

But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago,and drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have had $214.00. Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle...

It's called the 401-Keg Plan.

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 6:11 AM :: 9 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Monday, April 03, 2006 Insider Information!

Sheri's margaritas are strong as hell! Due to this, there are no pictures.


:)

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 4:16 PM :: 5 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------

Monday Morning

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery.
He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, "My carbroke down.
Do you think I could stay the night?"

The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car.
As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. A sound not Like anything he's ever heard before.

The Sirens that nearly seduced Odysseus into crashing his ship comes to his mind. He doesn't sleep that night. He tosses and turns trying to figure out what could possibly bemaking such a seductive sound.

The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say,"We can't tell you. You're not a monk."

Distraught, the man is forced to leave.

Years later, after never being able to forget that sound, the man goes back To the monastery and pleads for the answer again. The monks reply, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk."

The man says, "If the only way I can find out what is making that beautiful sound is to Become a monk, then please, make me a monk." The monks reply, "You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are, and the exact number of grains of sand When you find these answers, you will have become a monk."

The man sets about his task. After years of searching he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. "I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for:

By design, the world is in a state of perpetual change. Only God knows what you ask. All a man can know is himself, and only then if he is honest and reflective and willing to strip away self deception."

The monks reply, "Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the mystery of the sound." The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, "The sound is beyond that door."

The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man is given the key to the stone door and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. And so it went that he needed keys to doors of emerald, gold and diamond.

Finally, the monks say, "This is the last key to the last door." The man is apprehensive to no end. His life's wish is behind the door!

He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is utterly amazed to find the source of that haunting and seductive sound...........


















But I can't tell you what it is because you're not a monk.

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 6:11 AM :: 4 comments

Post / Read Comments

---------------oOo---------------