Celebrating Women...for the Real World
Thursday, November 30, 2006 Sound Off!

Today's post is going to be a little ranting:


Yesterday I was reading Tammy's blog and she really got me thinking about the whole 'Politically Correct' crap we endure day in and day out. I heard on the news yesterday that a Judge is making FEMA reinstate payments to the Katrina evacuees; and furthermore, that it is retro active. The hell? It has been almost a year and a half now? Are we going to have to support them forever?

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At work several of us were discussing reports that kids going off to college are ill prepared to live on their own. There are articles that state the kids can't balance a check book, haven't developed critical thinking skills as it relates to everyday life and that they don't know how to dicipline themselves to get their work done. I thought it was the parent's job to teach our own kids problem solving and common sense stuff. I guess some want the schools to raise them too? Most of ya’ll know how I feel about helicopter moms.

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By God (yes...that's right G - O - D). If I want to go to a 'Christmas Party' I'm going to a 'Christmas Party'. Don't call it a seasonal party or a holiday party or even a winter party. If you are offended by the 'CHRIST' in Christmas, then fk-it don't go!

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Who the hell came up with the term 'Politically Correct' anyway? Common decency has taught us to be respectful of others but THIS has gone way overboard.

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Would someone get through to our dog Zeus, that our cat (Mercedes) is NEVER going to be his friend as long as he sticks his cold, wet dog nose on her ass!

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That is all! I feel so much better now.

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 12:39 AM :: 8 comments

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Wednesday, November 29, 2006 Update.....The Casualty of Which I Spoke

Mkay, I told you to check back. If I remember correctly, the post below was about coffee....and casualties. Go ahead, read it. I'll wait.

Back already? Great. Here's the story. The door to the master bathroom is not standard. It's small. When a bitch tries to carry a clothes drying rack that's bigger than the doorway through said doorway at 5:30 a.m. without having adequate coffee....Ugh, don't make me relive it. See, it wasn't the initial going through the door that was the problem. It was when I remembered something I needed and turned quickly to go back into the bedroom with the drying rack in my hands that caused the problem! I tell ya, I can't function without my coffee!!

For your viewing pleasure, here is the catastrophe relived.





Exhibit A: This is the doorway from my bedroom to my bathroom. It's not standard size. It's stupid...it's outdated, but it's temporary. We're are temporarily renting. Long story. Anyway, if you are carrying something through the door, you must come in sideways. Don't say anything about the color of my bedroom. I didn't choose it!



Exhibit B: Trying to point out what happens when one tries to carry something wide through the door without turning sideways. I know, horrible picture. Work with me here...I'm wounded!

Exhibit C: This is the casualty. This is what one drying rack looks like after it is dropped kicked (several times) across the bathroom, then picked up and slammed down on the ground. All this AFTER the initial "getting stuck in the door and injuring someone". I guess I showed it who's boss around here!

Exhibit D: Finally I give you the leg (shut it...I know it needs to be shaved. Not going to do that after gouging the shit out of it. I can't like that!) I don't know if you can see the slight discoloration that's sure to be one Hell of a bruise by weeks end. Just pretend you do and send sympathy....and coffee! Send coffee!! I just called daughter and requested that she pick up a can on her way home. After this morning, she fully understands the importance of coffee!!

As for the drying rack-it will be cremated at sunrise!


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 12:03 AM :: 8 comments

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Tuesday, November 28, 2006 Tickle Tuesday.......Not

I know, I know, this is usually the day we post something light hearted and funny to boost you up and carry you through the week. Can't do it. It occurred to me last night that Aunt Flo is on her way. I can't like her. She's not very nice, but during stressful times, she's a terror. What stress could I have you ask? Football playoffs, Christmas shopping, Christmas decorating, working, mentally preparing for my sister's visit (we have issues, but I love her), mentally preparing for my step-daughter's visit (at the same time as my sister's-I'll have a house full-but my step-daughter is great-I love her like my own), etc., etc.

Do you feel my pain? No? Not yet? OK, here's another reason I'm not in a "Tickle Tuesday" kind of mood. See, I'm a coffee drinker, no, lover! I lurve me a good strong cup of coffee anytime of the day. I lurve me some flavored coffee. But I don't lurve flavored coffee in the morning. I'm a Folgers kind of girl first thing in the morning. Starbucks works too, but just their Breakfast blend, nothing fancy. After the first cup or two, I'm game; until then, just give me coffee!

What does this have to do with the love of Bob? I'll tell you. My wonderful husband gets the coffee maker ready before we go to bed. It brews on a timer so that after my shower, my blood line will be ready. No talking, no thinking, just coffee. This morning my nose detected a hint of caramel in the air. Not fully awake, I pour my cup of Joe, or Bob, or whatever you want to call it. I take that first sip. You know that first sip in the morning is comparable to sex.....well, when you're my age it is. You prepare for it, you think about it, your mouth waters for it.....wait, let me calm myself down. OK, better now. So I take that first sip and almost spit it across the room. I guess my husband knew that I noticed a problem and said, "We're out of Folgers, but for some reason this Folgers Select has a strange taste. Kind of like caramel." Now I'm mystified. First, I had no clue what this "Folgers Select" was to which he referred. Then I wondered why he didn't use the Starbucks coffee sitting right by the coffee maker. Then it hit me. In a moment of Holiday Cheer, or whatever you'd want to call it, I bought the Folgers flavored coffee-caramel flavor. It must have found its way all the way back to the corner of the cabinet. That's were all the crap goes that I buy and don't like. This stuff, in my opinion, tasted like warm water with a caramel crayon dipped in. Yuck. Double yuck when it's the first cup of the day.

Now, I'm not mad at my husband because I could have easily gotten my ass up from it's perch and prepared the coffee. I'm not mad at all. I'm in a funk. A cloud. Not having my first real cup of coffee in the a.m. does weird things to me. Don't believe me? Check back later-we had a casualty in the bathroom this morning. I believe the victim is DOA. I asked hubs to take a picture. I'm not telling the REST of the story without evidence. You'll have to check back for details.




In the meantime....please.....send.....coffee!!!!

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 8:06 AM :: 7 comments

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Monday, November 27, 2006 Friday Night Lights!

And We Move On!!!

Friday night we won our second playoff game against Lamar (29-7). The boys were calm and focused and all of us parents were all terrified and elated (at the same time I might add). Do you see where the boys got to play?


...at Frigin Reliant Stadium!
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So we won our Area Final and now move on to the Regional Semifinals (three games to the big show). OMG, we had no idea the boys would go this far. This is both exciting and exhausting; and what an awesome Senior year the boys are having.



...and we move on!





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Thursday, November 23, 2006 Happy Thanksgiving!

From our home to yours...
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we want to wish each of ya'll a wonderful
Thanksgiving with family and friends.
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Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 7:39 AM :: 8 comments

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Wednesday, November 22, 2006 Wisdom Teeth-Why???



I know, I promised last Friday that I'd post before and after pics of dear J. See, I'm a master procrastinator. This weeks excuse-My back thinks I'm older than I really am. It didn't take well to 3 hours of yard work on Sunday. Picture this-heating pad, walking hunched over, pink fuzzy slipper at the office because heals cause excruciating pain. Yeah, I broke down and went to the doctor today. I don't go to doctors. I can't like doctors. They want to do to many tests and stuff. I can't like tests. Lucky for me, I found a doc that believed me when I told him I didn't do anything to my back other than overexertion. I told him what how I thought I should treat it (let's try some drug therapy), and he agreed! Amazing-I've taken my sixth steroid in six hours. This stuff better work. My son G (I don't talk about him much, but let me say he has quite the sense of humor); he looked at me with that "there's something on your face" look. He said, I don't know about your back, but your mustache sure has grown! Funny guy!



Back to the pics. The whole wisdom teeth thing is said and done. Friday and Saturday were not fun. The swelling came on Sunday. We followed the docs orders and low and behold, she was up and running around (even worked) yesterday. She's such a quick healer. I do have to tell on her-after they loaded her in the car, not fully conscious, the first thing she asked for was her phone. I gave it to her just for grins. Of course she wasn't able to hold it much less text. The phone fell but her fingers kept moving as if she was texting. Her eyes were open! It was too funny.



Here she is:

Above-J Before Surgery (she wasn't thrilled that I was taking her pic without her makeup on)

Below-J after surgery (that's bear bear and blankie-she's had them forever. They've been through surgery with her before. Whenever I see those, I know some thing's wrong)


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 7:42 AM :: 11 comments

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Tuesday, November 21, 2006 Tickle Tuesday



Well, it's not Monday, and it's not Hump Day; so it must be Tickle Tuesday. This is our attempt to lighten you load and make your day a little brighter.

Enjoy!

Ten Thoughts To Ponder

Number 10: Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9: Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8: Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7: Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

Number 6: Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5: Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4: All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3: Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

Number 2: In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT TO PONDER IN 2006:


We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of Illegal immigrants and Terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.




Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 8:12 AM :: 4 comments

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Monday, November 20, 2006 Waste of Space Monday!


Parents Behaving Badly

Waste of Space Monday is brought to you by the lovely Tammy over at Rant & Raven' Haven. Here we have more bad-behaving parents at youth sports. This time, they’ve brought the violence down to the Pee Wee level.
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Date: Last week.
Location: Corpus Christi, Texas.
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The parents didn’t start the fire this time - it appears a coach did - but a few of them certainly didn’t mind getting in a few kicks for good measure. Pay particular attention at the 47-second mark to the woman who kicks another woman in the tush, sending her tumbling onto the human pile below.
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See video HERE
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Parents...Get. a. Grip!
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We found out this weekend that the boys' next playoff game will be played at Reliant Stadium.
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Holy Cow Batman!

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 7:15 AM :: 7 comments

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Saturday, November 18, 2006 Friday Night Lights!




Football Frinzy!




The boys won their first playoff game 35 to 7. I know we will not have it as easy throughout the rest of the playoffs. M and G2 shaved their heads again but now about 80% of the team have joined the madness.

Since they won their first playoff game they will now have a Team photo permanently displayed in the Field House. I wonder if they will all be bald when that photo is taken?

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BOYS!




B.F.N.D.
GO BOBCATS!

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 7:48 AM :: 9 comments

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Friday, November 17, 2006 Stuff Portrait Friday!



It’s hard to believe that it is time for SPF again! This week, Kristine wants to dedicate SPF to Janelle to honor National Epilepsy Awareness Month. Our assignment:

1. Something you seize (as in seizure, get it?)
2. Something that shakes (because you shake when you have seizures)
3. And something purple (because purple is the color for National Epilepsy Awareness Month!



SOMETHING I SEIZE

This one I will take more literal. Both of my G’s have each had a seizure. Each time I think I aged at least ten years. When G2 had his I was there, and it is true that training kicks in. I was calm and did what I needed to do but in the ambulance once G2 was fully conscious, the EMT made me lie down and gave me oxygen. Big G’s came on some years later when he was playing a video game (yes, strobe type lighting can trigger seizures in some people) at lunch. I got to the hospital as fast as I could. Both are fine today and I don’t care to have to go through that type of situation again.


SOMETHING THAT SHAKES

It shakes where I grew up. I give you Mexico City and boy can it shake. There is nothing like waking up in the morning on the floor because you have been thrown out of the bed from an earth quake (that only happened once). The strongest Earthquake I’ve been in was 6.5 on the Richter Scale.



SOMETHING PURPLE

I couldn’t think of anything in the house that is purple so then it hit me…why not use one of the pictures from the boy’s Colorado trip. I figure, what better purple than from America the Beautiful? So I give you…Purple Mountain’s Majesty.




So tell us...Did you play?

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Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 12:00 AM :: 15 comments

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Thursday, November 16, 2006 This & That and All Things Cold!!!!!

Gees. It was 83 on Tuesday. This morning out in the burbs it was like 40! I went to bed in, well, nothing; and woke up FREEZING! WTF! That's Houston for ya! This time instead of downpours bringing in the cold weather; we had wind. Not just wind, but WIND! The tree knocking down, power going out kind of wind! It was crazy! Do like this cold weather however. It does wonders to get one into the Holiday mode! SuZan mentioned getting her Christmas stuff out this weekend. At first I was like "so soon"? Then I was like - wow! Next week IS Thanksgiving!

Thanks for the "boyfriend dumping advice" for my daughter. It was very helpful. Yes, I think we have a potential stalker. Very co-dependant. I can't like it. After we talked, she admitted that this "other guy" may just seem so attractive because it was an excuse to end relationship with other guy. She agreed that to pursue that relationship wouldn't be such a good idea right now. We'll see what happens.

Since you've read all the way to the end, I'd like to give you something to think about. Let's say that your parents move out of a big house (5 bedroom; 4200 sq. feet). Said house is vacant and for sale. When you were a teenager (boy or girl), would you have taken advantage of the opportunity and maybe have a party at empty house?

Check back tomorrow for "Stuff Portrait Friday" and before and after pics. of J. She gets her wisdom teeth out tomorrow.

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 8:08 AM :: 6 comments

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Wednesday, November 15, 2006 Celebrating Women's November Blog Pick of the Month

Celebrating Women’s
2006
NOVEMBER BLOG PICK OF THE MONTH

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We are late again but only in posting not in picking. Without further delay we both agreed that this month's Blog Pick should be Kelly over at Missing TJ Snow. Kelly describes herself as a Wife, a Mother, a hard worker and an avid Angels fan from beautiful Southern California. She works full time outside the home which she says helps her stay sane most days.


Kelly also blogs Jennelle's Journey and contributes to the blog Postcards from Holland. What we love about Kelly is her drive for her family. Her determination to give Jennell and Jack the best life that they could possibly have; her resolved to educate all of us on children with special needs. She makes us laugh, cry, hold our breath as we read all the challenges and successes that Janelle goes through.

November is National Epilepsy Awareness Month; and Kelly is dedicating her blog this month to the education of Epilepsy. During the month of November, she is also listing things she is thankful for everyday.


Kelly hosts "Sunday Six" which is so much fun to read. She posts 6 questions towards the end of the week and the players get to post the answers to these questions on Sunday. The trick to the game is that you have to get the answers from your kids; and with young kiddos the answers are hilarious. She also plays "Stuff Portrait Friday" and "Waste of Space Monday". Kelly will write about everyday life; the challenges of having a child of special needs; funny things; serious things; family things and whatever is going on in her mind at the time. So Kelly, for this we celebrate you!


So go over and say hello to Kelly and help us celebrate:



Celebrating Women’s
November 2006
Blog Pick of the Month


For Jennelle:

Her Local Support Group - The Epilepsy Alliance of Orange County

National Epilepsy Foundation

More about November as National Epilepsy Awareness Month

More about our Daughter's diagnosis - Lennox Gastaut Syndrome


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 12:00 AM :: 6 comments

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Tuesday, November 14, 2006 Tickle Tuesday....and other stuff!


GAMES FOR WHEN WE ARE OLDER
1. Sag, you're It.
2. Hide and go pee.
3 . 20 questions shouted into your good ear.
4. Kick the bucket
5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over.
6 Musical recliners.
7. Si mon says something incoherent.
8. Pin the Toupee on the bald guy.

SIGNS OF MENOPAUSE:
1. You sell your home heating system at a yard sale.
2. You have to write post-it notes with your kids' names on them.
3. You change your underwear after a sneeze.

OLD IS WHEN:
1. Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
2. You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
3. Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.
4 . An all-nighter means not getting up to pee!

Thoughts to ponder:
Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctr Alt Delete' and start all over?

Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!

Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

But Most Of All, Remember !
A Good Friend Is Like A Good Bra. Hard to Find, Supportive, Comfortable, And Always Close To Your Heart!

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Advice for a teenager?

Need some advice here. My 16 year old daughter is not sure how to breakup with boyfriend. They are both 16 and they met almost exactly one year ago. Yes, I told her they were getting too serious too soon. Yes, I told her she is 16 and she should have "friends", not serious boyfriends. But, what do I know? I'm a MOM for Bob's sake. Anyway, there is someone else that is catching her interest. She has decided that I may not be that stupid after all. She is having a hard time getting rid of said boyfriend. She's done the "let's take a break" thing. Didn't work. She's done the "I never want to see you" thing. Didn't work.

Any great ideas as to give the guy the "heave ho"?

Sincerely,
Thelma

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Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 12:32 AM :: 8 comments

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Saturday, November 11, 2006 Co-DISTRICT CHAMPS!


Co-DISTRICT CHAMPS!


BFND!
(Bobcat Fight Never Dies)

Our boys are off to the playoffs! They ended the regular season 9-1 and ranked 9th in the State. The game tonight was exciting. When we all arrived at the stadium the temp was a humid 85 degrees but the game was delayed because of lightning and they finally started playing at 10:30 PM (3 hour delay).

When the game started the temp had dropped to a windy 60 degrees (but it felt like 40). No jackets, no blankets, no coats, no hot chocolate or coffee. Sheri's daughter earned a place in heaven when she and her boyfriend left and brought back blankets and sweatshirts. Thank you "J"...I love you!

Now you know that boys will be boys; so you know they were going to do something crazy. The offensive line decided to shave their heads at school. Of course, when do you think that we found this out?... at the game when they removed their helmets:


Here is Sheri's son M:

What a ham!
And here is my son G2:

Lookin' all tough-mean!


Great job Bobcats...we look forward to the playoffs!



Check out one of the coolest plays of the season:

HERE!

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Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 10:00 AM :: 9 comments

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Friday, November 10, 2006 Stuff Portrait Friday!


I’m finally returning to the living…just in time for SPF! This week, Kristine wants us to think a little ‘out of the box’. We can make it as hard or as easy as we want this week. Our assignment:

1. YES!
2. NO!
3. MAYBE.

Since every day revolves around these three words. This is the yes, no or maybe in our house right now.

YES

The “yes” has been nice as we no longer are chauffeurs for G2. Now that he has his own wheels he actually runs some errands for me.

NO

Of course with the “yes” leaves us with a big fat “no money” in our wallets. Just wait till you get the insurance bills!

MAYBE


G2’s Senior year brings all kinds of maybes. Maybe he will go here:

…or maybe he will go here:

…or maybe he will go here:


…I know he would like to go here:




How funny. I didn't tell SuZan I was going to play. Tee Hee! So I'm going to sneak mine in. I kind of cheated. I was going to post one picture for all three. But, I know you'd be disappointed. So here are mine:





My Tennis Shoes (Sneakers to you Yankees). This is a yes- I planned to go to the gym today. No-I really didn't want to go. Maybe I won't be sore tomorrow when I wake up.



Yes-this is my knee. No-it's not happy that I went to the gym. Maybe-I'll actually sit down, elevate, and ice it. A wee little bit swollen there. Ouch.


Finally-Yes, that's my son's number. No-I can't believe he's a Senior. Maybe-We'll win tomorrow!

So tell us…did you play?

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Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 12:00 AM :: 13 comments

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Tuesday, November 07, 2006 Something Funny and Things We Need to Know!

Keep this on the Fridge





Did You Know That?





Drinking two glasses of Gatorade can relieve headache pain almost immediately without the unpleasant side effects caused by traditional "pain relievers." (Yup, tried this this past weekend-works!)





Did you know that Colgate toothpaste makes an excellent salve for burns.





Before you head to the drugstore for a high-priced inhaler filled with mysterious chemicals, try chewing on a couple of curiously strong Altoids peppermints. They'll clear up your stuffed nose.





Achy muscles from a bout of the flu? Mix 1 Tablespoon of horseradish in 1cup of olive oil. Let the mixture sit for 30 minutes, then apply it as a massage oil, for instant relief for aching muscles.





Sore throat? Just mix 1/4 cup of vinegar with 1/4 cup of honey and take 1tablespoon six times a day. The vinegar kills the bacteria.





Cure urinary tract infections with Alka-Seltzer. Just dissolve two tablets in a glass of water and drink it at the onset of the symptoms. Alka-Seltzer begins eliminating urinary tract infections almost instantly even though the product was never been advertised for this use.(Note: Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold Medicine is not the same. and contains aspirin, which can cause stomach bleeding if you have ulcers.) (Must try this)





Honey remedy for skin blemishes. Cover the blemish with a dab of honey and place a Band-Aid over it. Honey kills the bacteria, keeps the skin sterile, and speeds healing. Works overnight. (Going to try this tonight!)





Listerine therapy for toenail fungus. Get rid of unsightly toenail fungus by soaking your toes in Listerine mouthwash. The powerful antiseptic leaves your toenails looking healthy again.





Easy eyeglass protection. To prevent the screws in eyeglasses from loosening, apply a small drop of Maybelline Crystal Clear nail polish to the threads of the screws before tightening them.





Coca-Cola cure for rust. Forget those expensive rust removers. Just saturate an abrasive sponge with Coca Cola and scrub the rust stain. The phosphoric acid in the coke is what gets the job done.





Cleaning liquid that doubles as bug killer. If menacing bees, wasps, hornets, or yellow jackets get in your home and you can't find the insecticide, try a spray of Formula 409 .Insects drop to the ground instantly.





Smart splinter remover just pour a drop of Elmer's Glue-All over the splinter, let dry, and peel the dried glue off the skin.





The splinter sticks to the dried glue. Hunt's tomato paste boil cure .cover the boil with Hunt's tomato paste as a compress. The acids from the tomatoes soothe the pain and bring the boil to a head.





Balm for broken blisters. To disinfect a broken blister, dab on a few drops of Listerine .a powerful antiseptic.





Heinz vinegar to heal bruises. Soak a cotton ball in white vinegar and apply it to the bruise for 1 hour. The vinegar reduces the blueness and speeds up the healing process.





Kills fleas instantly . Dawn dish washing liquid does the trick. Add a few drops to your dog's bath and shampoo the animal thoroughly. Rinse well to avoid skin irritations. Goodbye fleas.





Rainy day cure for dog odor. Next time your dog comes in from the rain, simply wipe down the animal with Bounce or any dryer sheet, instantly making your dog smell springtime fresh. (I wonder if it will also keep the mosquitoes away from him)





Eliminate ear mites. All it takes is a few drops of Wesson corn oil in your cat's ear. Massage it in, then clean with a cotton ball. Repeat daily for 3 days. The oil soothes the cat's skin, smothers the mites, and accelerates healing.





Quaker Oats for fast pain relief. It's not for breakfast anymore! Mix 2cups of Quaker Oats and 1 cup of water in a bowl and warm in the microwave for 1 minute, cool slightly, and apply the mixture to your hands for soothing relief from arthritis pain.





And now for the funny......



Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired, and Mrs. Fenton insists her husband go with her to Walmart, but he gets bored with all the shopping trips. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse. Here's a letter sent to the Mrs.

Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below.

Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Walmart:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the s tore suspiciously loudly humming the"Mission Impossible" theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO ! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"And last, but not least ....
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

Regards,
Walmart

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 8:34 AM :: 5 comments

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Monday, November 06, 2006 We Have Returned! or "The Story of The Traveling Thong"



We have returned from the land of "big hair and shiny shoes". We had a blast! I don't have time to tell the whole story, so here are some words that relate to the weekend....you guys can make up your own story! The words/phrases are: I not know; I can't like it; there's someone laying on your front sidewalk; good morning sunshine; I think she drank like a whole suit case of beer; shit who is that in bed with me; I'd like the "Hovas"; is my hair big enough; I have sticky titties; a gay bar; my purse is vibrating but my phone is in my pocket; can I have my keys back; and my favorite-snowy bagels and snowy balls!

OK-enough. Like I said, you make up the story. Whatever you put together probably will be close to what really happened. If you want, put your story in our comments! We would like to thank Mr. & Mrs. Dallas K and Nik for letting us stay at their house. They are the some of the sweetest people and graciously let us camp out. Their house is fabo! Mrs. Dallas K makes some kick-ass egg tacos!

Oh, and my camera wasn't working so I didn't get pictures. SuZan did, so she'll probably post some updates later. In the interest of man kind and all things good, I stole some. Here they are:

The "Bitches"



Thelma & Louise (That's really us)
My eyes aren't red & glossy. I promise we only had a few Vanilla Rum w/Coke Zeros.
What? Yeah I put twice as much rum in each drink-what's the problem?

Whataburger-the best hangover prevention in the world! Word Up!

For the rest of the story, try here, here, here & here. Also, make sure to check out Kami's site for the return of "Titty Tuesday!"


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 9:14 AM :: 8 comments

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Saturday, November 04, 2006 Road Trip to the Land of Big Hair & Shiny Shoes!




We are out of here!

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 9:01 AM :: 3 comments

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Friday, November 03, 2006 Stuff Portrait Friday!


TGIF! That means it must be time for SPF. Well, Kristine says that she is feeling lazy…SOOO she is going to make it easy on us this week. That is good because I have been sick in bed most of the week and so my SPF is not so imaginative this week. Our assignment:

1. The Good
2. The Bad
3. The Ugly

THE GOOD

Our pets when they are sleeping look like little angels. Of course I chose Mercedes because now that she is well and fully recuperated from her surgery, is acting so sweet. So for this week, she is the good.

THE BAD

Yep, I caught him. We wondered why the dog sometimes wreaks havoc around the house at night and here is my answer. The dog likes coffee! Sorry the photo is fuzzy but I had to click fast. He is drinking my coffee here and we figured out that when he drinks my precious brew, he pulls stunts like this while we sleep because HE dosen't:


THE UGLY

You know, I find nothing warm and fuzzy (pun intended) about Lewi, our lizard. So he gets “the ugly” vote this week.


So tell us…did you play?

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Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 4:42 AM :: 19 comments

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Thursday, November 02, 2006 Ahhh, November


I have to tell ya, I love Thanksgiving. I love the month of November. I love it as much as, if maybe not a little more than Christmas. When I look back, the most enjoyable family gatherings were on Thanksgiving. And then there is the food. I mean, who doesn't remember waking to the smell of turkey already cooking. Oh, and the pies. I think I just gained 5 lbs. thinking about it.

Unfortunately, I never got to enjoy a family Thanksgiving dinner as "an adult". I left home when I was 18 soon after graduating. I never got to "go home" for Thanksgiving as my mother died on November 4th. I was planning to come home. I had my plane ticket to come home. But, that didn't happen. Fortunately, my husband's family has taken me in and treated me as their own. It's amazing to see the similarities between his family, Texas born, Texas bread; and my family, Yankee born, Yankee, well, I'm not going to finish that sentence.

The best part of all though must be making those silly hand turkeys. I love them. Love, love, love them. I don't care if they are just traced and colored or more elaborate with glitter and googly eyes; I love them. To this day, my kids still make me one. To this day, I still hang them on my fridge until Christmas decor comes out.

Any favorite Thanksgiving memories for y'all?

Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 8:46 AM :: 6 comments

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Wednesday, November 01, 2006 OPTICAL ILLUSIONS

Didn't have much today but a friend of ours sent this our way...pretty cool

(some I had seen before).

Is This Possible?







Are the purple lines straight or bent?



Do you see gray areas in between the squares?

Now where did they come from?





You should see a man's face and also a word... Hint: Try tilting

your head to the right, the world begins with 'L'







Enjoy!


Posted by Sheri & SuZan :: 8:35 AM :: 8 comments

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