Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Tickle Tuesday.....and other stuff.
Part 1: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror, make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower.
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Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower.
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Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
Part 2: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her while making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower.
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Wash your face.
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Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse the snot off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair.
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Make a shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
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If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on her pillow.
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. Have a great day! Oh, and... woo-woo!!!
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The Other Stuff
As Sheri mentioned, we went to our kids' Homecoming game Friday night. They had us moms that have Senior football players hold the banner for the boys to run thru. After the kickoff, because there were so many of us I decided I would try and get a video of it after halftime. The funny part is the mom asking me what I'm doing.
Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos.,.,, The boys are 6-0 now.Go Bobcats!Labels: Tickle Tuesday
Posted by Sheri & SuZan ::
12:00 AM ::
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Sunday, October 15, 2006
Homecoming 2006
If you've checked our blog last week, you know that this past weekend was our homecoming. We had a blast, but boy, am I glad we're done with that! I was a little worried that my "Friday the 13th" fear was coming to fruition as the other team scored first; but after a "stern" YELLING, er, talking to, our boys got it together and we won our homecoming game.
Here is our weekend in pictures:
The top of the mum I made for M's date (double mum)
The top of the mum J's boyfriend's mom made for her. I told his mom "you made a porn star teddy bear". She dressed the bear in read lace with no panties! I was just kidding. She doesn't understand my sense of humor.
The "whole" picture. I couldn't get any closer!
This is J before school on Friday. They get to wear the mums to school. Yeah, not too much work gets done that day. You see how it's pulling her shirt down! Oh, and she's eating one of my scrumptious homemade apple cinnamon muffins! This is J at her finest! We have so much fun-except when she thinks I'm a senile old woman!
J & C all ready to go! Believe it or not, it was warm enough to jump in the pool!
My son M and his date N. No, my son and daughter and their dates don't travel together. In fact, most people don't know that they are brother & sister!
The Boys. No other explanation needed!
Hummer Limo. My ass has never been in regular Hummer. Let alone a Hummer Limo!
And this is how they were able to afford the Hummer. The squeezed as many as possible inside and shared the cost. My son being the, um-man that he is, left the tickets to the dance in his truck. Big G tried to break in to his truck so that I could get the tickets and meet him at the dance. If you ever want a truck that is burglar proof-buy a Chevy Pick-up. Michael ended up having the limo drop everyone off at the dance after dinner, then bring him and his date to his truck to get the tickets, then back to the dance. That was pretty smart considering they had the limo based on time, not distance. He thoroughly enjoyed having the limo to himself!
Hopefully I didn't bore you too much. SuZan got took a great video of the boys breaking through the sign before the game. Hopefully we can get that posted later! Until then, stay dry Houston!
Posted by Sheri & SuZan ::
10:28 PM ::
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Friday, October 13, 2006
Friday the 13th!!!!!!
No SPF here! And, it was an easy one! See, it's homecoming week here and every time I think I'll have a spare moment, I'm wrong! My daughter said "I just want the dance to get here so that we can have fun. I'm tired of all the stress of trying to make things perfect." Poor kids. Isn't homecoming supposed to be fun?
Are you superstitious? I didn't think I was, but now I think maybe I am. When the alarm went off this morning, instead of my usually happy "it's Friday" thoughts; I had "Yikes, it's Friday the 13th" thoughts.
Here is the odd part of my fear-nothing bad has ever happened to me on Friday the 13th! Nothing! Notta! So why do I have this heaviness in my heart? I hugged my kids - twice! Told them to be extra careful and drive slowly. To add insult to injury-tonight is our homecoming game. Who schedules homecoming on Friday the 13th?
I guess I'll be extra careful today. I'll try not to break mirrors, step on cracks, spill salt, or anything else that's said to bring "bad luck".
Happy Friday! Go Bobcats! BFND!!
Posted by Sheri & SuZan ::
8:06 AM ::
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Thursday, October 12, 2006
Homecoming Parade
G2 and M's High School has a Homecoming parade each year that travels around their Elementary and Middle schools. It is funny that both of our boys decided in Kindergarten that they were going to play football so that they could ride the fire truck in this parade.
Sometimes life in Stepford is kinda fun!
Posted by Sheri & SuZan ::
1:07 AM ::
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Wednesday, October 11, 2006
Bevo-You Will Be Missed
Bevo, you've done well. You've made us proud. Please go here to read of this legend and join me in a moment of silence. Bevo, you will be missed!
(***Blogger-why won't you let me post a picture of this fine creature?!?)
Posted by Sheri & SuZan ::
7:55 AM ::
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Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Tickle Tuesday.....and other stuff.
Bet we can make you smile today!
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Cover the kiddo's eyes...
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See, we told you we would make you smile.
Is this motivation for keeping one's car clean or what?
The other stuff...if you can concentrate now :)
Mercedes had to go in and have surgery and she came out just fine. She had her "goodie box" taken out and they had to go back and remove a claw that was trying to grow back. You can tell when the pain meds kick in because she turns into a kitten and runs around the house then drops and purrs.
We don't shut Zeus up in the crate any more because he can unzip it; he loves it though and does sleep in it when we go to bed. But...here is what happens when someone leaves the bathroom door open at night when everyone is suppost to be sleeping:
We started making the mums for Homecoming; here is the battle ground:
Yes we had margaritas...it wasn't the most productive evening but it was fun!
The boys are still kicking butt as they are now 5-0. They are ranked #10 in Texas! Now if I can do something about the photographer and make me (opps) her stop shaking the damn camara when I (opps) she clicks...
Go Bobcats!
Labels: Random Stuff, Tickle Tuesday
Posted by Sheri & SuZan ::
12:00 AM ::
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Monday, October 09, 2006
Celebrating Women's OCTOBER BLOG PICK OF THE MONTH!
Celebrating Women’s
OCTOBER BLOG PICK OF THE MONTH
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We know we are late but ya'll aready know that life just gets in the way sometimes. Without further delay we both agreed that this month's Blog Pick should be Southern Fried Girl.
Southern Fried Girl lives in New Orleans, Louisiana and is married to a firefighter. She has two step-children, a dog named Gage and two cats, Reba and Hoss. We love that she challenged herself to read at least 50 books this year and last we checked she'll blow that goal out of the water (she has reviews #46 and #47 posted).
This is what she says about herself:
10 things about SFG by SFG
1) I am actually a super nice girl who comes off as such a fucking bitch.
2) Since knowing my cute FIL, I now recognize how fucking hilarious and cute most old men are.
3) I hope I really get over some things, but I don't see it coming any time soon.
4) I like my pets more than most people.
5) I believe in God.
6) I wish I could lose at leat 20 lbs.
7) It took me being broken up from the hubs for 3 years for me to realize that he was the one for me.
8) I really admire my Father. He is a pain in the ass, but works hard and expects others to do the same..
9) I really can't wait to be pregnant.
10) I am thankful for my life.
What we love about Southern Fried Girl is that she expresses herself much like many of us wish we would. We would say that "Straight talk" is a good description of her style. She also plays "Stuff Portrait Friday"; "Waste of Space Monday"; "Way Back Wednesday"; and "Fug Thursday". With her quick wit, dry sense of humor, and keyboard in hand...she can make us laugh (until we pee our pants), cry, and ponder the thought that "gee, I've felt that way before". So thank you Southern Fried Girl for putting it all out there for us. For this we celebrate you!
So go over and say hello to SFG and help us celebrate:
Celebrating Women’s
October 2006
Blog Pick of the Month
Labels: Blog Pick of the Month
Posted by Sheri & SuZan ::
12:35 AM ::
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Friday, October 06, 2006
Stuff Portrait Friday!
TGIF! Yeah…it’s Friday! Of course that means that it’s time SPF; sponsored by the lovely Kristine over at
Random And Odd. If you play, go by and let Kristine know you did. This week she has requested pictures of:
1. Your Label — If you made clothes, what would your label be? What kind of clothes would you make?
2. YOUR personal Label — We all hate to be labeled, but sadly we are. What is YOUR label? Can you capture it in a picture? Are you just going to write it on a scrap of paper and take a picture of it? Do you have a picture that shows us what it is?
3. Your FAVORITE Label — I like Target clothes cause they are comfortable and they don’t usually have tags in them. Some people love Coach bags (I’m not saying any names, but the brat is in the picture below this post) and some people just like the look of certain label. Show us yours.
MY LABEL
Hmmmm? Last weekend I happen to see that Sheri’s daughter J had the cutest Coach purse. I threatened and have been contemplating ways to snag that puppy up.
:)
MY PERSONAL LABEL
I picked this representation of a label because sometimes I can wear my emotions on my sleeve. I try to be cool and maintain a flat affect but it just doesn’t happen. As you can probably guess, I’m not that great at poker.
MY FAVORITE LABEL
This one was so easy! Like Mama Duck, (who introduced me to the phrase “
Targasm”) I am crazy about Target. The sight of that red bull’s-eye just gets me salivating, when I tell Big G that I’m off to Tarr-gget, he starts having heart palpitations…and we will just leave it at that.
So tell us…did you play? Labels: SPF
Posted by Sheri & SuZan ::
12:12 AM ::
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